Amadeus

Hello! I am a Hermann tortoise and my name is “Amadeus”. My species hails from France, where I was adopted by an American tourist visiting an exotic pet store in Paris, where I spent two miserable, boring months in captivity. Anyway, my new adoptive parents took me home with them to America and glorious Southern California where I am now part of a wonderful cooky family. I say cooky because how many people do you know that are nutty enough to take on a turtle as a household pet? Not too many, I’m sure.

My new home is an elegant three story town house in Santa Monica, where I now get to roam (slowly) about a beautiful high rise patio garden and sundeck all day long. I must tell you, it sure beats the living heck out of that noisy pet store in Paris. One of my adoptive parents (female version) is an avid equestrian, so I also get to go horseback riding on “Christopher Robin”, her miniature stallion, and sometimes on “Goliath”, her high rise stallion. Since saddles for turtles are hard to come by, I have to ride bareback. And what an experience it is. I love it!

This coming weekend, we’re going ti the high desert, where I’ll get to meet lots of interesting critters like Geckos and other tiny lizards (which I love to eat if they’re small enough and I’m hungry enough) and also some big guys , like desert foxes and coyotes which I’ve heard so much about. If any of them get rambunctious with me, I’ve got my shell an beak to have a go at it. Snakes I can do without, especially rattlers, but if I come across any, I’ll just have to keep my head tucked deep into my shell. And who knows, I might even come across a friendly desert tortoise or two. And how about rock climbing? I guess I could do it if it isn’t straight up. Na, even then I don’t think so. My schtick is level! Anyway, we’ll spend two days in the desert and hope I don’t get lost. Then Its back to the city.

My new human mom and dad are really cool, and very smart too. And I know they love me. Next week they’re taking me to the vet for a thorough checkup. And after that, I’ll be going to the groomer where my shell will be scraped and polished and my nails trimmed. After that it’s back to the patio garden and sundeck where I’ll lull about all day long doing absolutely nothing. Ah, what a life!  What a life!

By the way, dear reader, this has been my first cut at story writing. Not bad for a turtle, eh? I hope you enjoyed this little tale as much as I enjoyed writing it. And remember, don’t be a finger nipper when someone tries to pet you, as I once did until my human dad broke me of the habit. It doesn’t win you many friends.

Au revoir et salut

Mel Salvat
Cathedral City, California